The Inner Game

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The Inner Game

Every game has two parts: an outer game and an inner game.

The outer game is played against an external opponent, to overcome an external obstacle, and to reach an external goal.

• Growing a business

• Developing a personal brand

• Achieving financial and time freedom

• Building a healthy relationship

The inner game is played against yourself, taking place in the arena of your mind, to overcome your inner obstacles and unlearn the habits of your mind:

• Self-doubt

• Self-abandonment

• Worrying and fearing

• Attachment and controlling

The inner game is played to obtain something far greater than the satisfaction of achievement: the fulfillment of self-mastery.

Winning the inner game doesn’t add to your list of accolades and accomplishments. But the rewards and benefits you gain are lifelong and contribute to every single arena you decide to step into.

Whenever I meet someone who’s successful, I always ask them: “I want to play at the level you’re playing at, what advice would you have for me?”

The answer’s almost always something along the lines of: “master your personal habits”

I find this hilarious because when I tell my clients how important it is to build better systems, processes, and habits for both self-mastery and business… they smile, nod, and then ask “what else?”.

They’re looking for something more exciting, profound, and groundbreaking:

• The latest marketing tactic

• The proven growth strategy

• The most profitable business model

I get it, personal habits and systems are so boring.

But study, analyze, and reverse engineer every successful (and truly happy) person and you’ll discover that they’ll attribute their success and fulfillment to the same thing: self-mastery of the inner game.

So my invitation for you is to reflect on:

• What outer game are you playing in this season of your life and business?

• What does winning this outer game look and feel like?

• What inner game are you playing in this season?

• What does winning this inner game look and feel like?

• How will winning the inner game contribute to the natural win of the outer game?

If reflecting on this excites you… you’re going to love the Monk Mode Monday series.

Today’s practice for you…

Recognize The 2 Players

When you’re standing in the arena, there are 2 parts of you that are playing the game:

• Player 1: the “Coach”

• Player 2: the “Player”

The key to self-mastery, or mastering anything, lies in the relationship between Player 1 and Player 2.

Player 2 plays the game. It holds all the potential, skills, and experience to naturally play and win the game. Player 1 tells Player 2 how to play the game, how well or poorly they played, and what outcomes to aim for.

Seems simple, a powerful duo and much-needed formula for peak performance.

Yes, and the problem is when Player 1 doesn’t trust Player 2 to achieve the desired outcomes, despite Player 2 embodying all the potential and power to do so.

This is where your personal habits, beliefs, and thought patterns get in the way:

• Self-criticism: “you did a shitty job there”

• Self-doubt: “you’re not ____ enough for this”

• Over-controlling: “try harder”

• Worry, fear, guilt, shame…

The 2 parts of you are conflicting, creating noise and pressure that gets in the way of you operating at your best.

Both parts are needed, neither good or bad, right or wrong. Both parts need to play well together, this is what we call integrating your parts.

Step 1 is Awareness. To be aware that these 2 parts exist within us and to recognize which part is in the driver's seat at each moment of the game we’re playing.

Practice:

• When facing challenges or issues this week, pause and reflect

• Recognize and call out the 2 Players: the coach and the player

• Which player is in the driver’s seat?

Just recognize and notice.

Nothing to do at this stage. Practice putting in the reps of awareness.

We’ll explore more next week!

Your Pal,

Colin